*DIFFERENT WAYS OF LOOKING AT THINGS Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and family
values. Stu said, 'I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?' Leroy replied, 'I'm not sure, what was her maiden name?' --------------------------------------------------------- 'Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully,' the divorce Court
Judge said, 'And I've decided to give your wife $775 a week.' 'That's very fair, your honor,' the husband said. 'And every now and then
I'll try to send her a few bucks myself.' --------------------------------------------------------- A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room,
took the husband aside, and said, 'I don't like the looks of your wife
at all.' 'Me neither doc,' said the husband. 'But she's a great cook and really good*
with the kids.' ----------------------------------------------------------- An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has
been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, 'Maybe, but you
will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on
you.' The old man says without hesitation, 'I now pronounce you man and wife.' ---------------------------------------------------------- Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder: 1. The DNA all matches. 2. There are no dental records. ** **---------------------------------------------------------- A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, 'Can you tell me how long it'll tak*
*e** to** **fly from San Francisco to New York City ?' The agent
replies, 'Just a minute.' 'Thank you,' the blonde says, and hangs up.
**
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*
*
The graveside service just barely finished, when there was massive clap of
thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even
more thunder rumbling in the distance.* * The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well, she's
there.'*
values. Stu said, 'I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?' Leroy replied, 'I'm not sure, what was her maiden name?' --------------------------------------------------------- 'Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully,' the divorce Court
Judge said, 'And I've decided to give your wife $775 a week.' 'That's very fair, your honor,' the husband said. 'And every now and then
I'll try to send her a few bucks myself.' --------------------------------------------------------- A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room,
took the husband aside, and said, 'I don't like the looks of your wife
at all.' 'Me neither doc,' said the husband. 'But she's a great cook and really good*
with the kids.' ----------------------------------------------------------- An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has
been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, 'Maybe, but you
will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on
you.' The old man says without hesitation, 'I now pronounce you man and wife.' ---------------------------------------------------------- Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder: 1. The DNA all matches. 2. There are no dental records. ** **---------------------------------------------------------- A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, 'Can you tell me how long it'll tak*
*e** to** **fly from San Francisco to New York City ?' The agent
replies, 'Just a minute.' 'Thank you,' the blonde says, and hangs up.
**
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*
*
The graveside service just barely finished, when there was massive clap of
thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even
more thunder rumbling in the distance.* * The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well, she's
there.'*
